“Great people talk about ideas; average people talk about things; small people talk about other people.”
What does it mean?
This is a really important quote. Please take as much time as you need to fully understand it – it may take months or more.
First, this quote says “talk about” on every line. That means that it is focusing on the times that you’re chatting with someone in a time of “open” conversation. You run into a neighbor. You have a bourbon with a friend. You text your sibling to catch up. This quote is not about times where there’s something important to discuss, like a sick family member or a bill that needs to be paid.
Now, let’s look at each line of the quote, one at a time.
Great people talk about ideas, because they think about the big picture. They’re focused on perspectives, strategies, concepts, and ideas that they can adopt to make life better. Great people are always trying to improve on where they are in life, so they look for things that will make today better than yesterday. Ideas are big and impact a lot of different areas of life, so to great people, ideas are what will have the biggest return on investment for their time and energy.
Average people talk about things, because things are central to their lives. The car, the house, the job, the bills – these occupy the mind. Everyone should pay attention to these, but this quote isn’t about responsibilities – it’s about personality. If, in those “open” conversations, you always end up talking about things, and not ideas, then you’re in this zone; similarly, think about the person you’re talking to.
Small people talk about other people, because they’re struggling inside. They’re unsure of themselves and probably suffer from low self-esteem, and may even be dealing with mental illness. They compare themselves to others constantly, and as a result, that’s what they want to talk about all the time. They might also feel that putting others down makes them a better person.
One last thing about understanding the quote: we all talk about other people, about things, and about ideas. What matters is if we are talking about people that we progress toward ideas. That is, if we talk about the crazy neighbor that we look for the big picture, like what might have made him and others crazy in the first place!
What you should take from this quote
First, you should reflect on what you are. Are you the person who always wants to talks about others, and avoids big ideas? Do you talk about ideas, but want to be a bigger-picture thinker? Do you find yourself focused on things, and want to raise things to the next level? Figure out where you are – and be honest! The only way to improve is to say “I am currently here” and to avoid “Well I’ll be there soon.” Only the honest will truly improve. Ever.
Second, you should look at who you surround yourself with. Who we are is highly defined by who we give our time and attention to. Are you surrounding yourself with people who at least talk about things? Do you have at least a few people who think and talk about ideas? If most of your circle engages in gossip, then consider how that influences your life. You don’t necessarily ditch those people, but you should shift where you spend your time. It’s an emotional drain, and surely won’t help you get ahead in life.
Third, you should strive to help others understand this idea (pun intended!). If you get it, and are a person who thinks and talks about ideas – or at least things – then can make a huge difference by showing this personality to others. Don’t hide it! Some people think that talking about ideas makes them sound pompous or arrogant. To small-minded people, it does – but they are not the ones you should be worrying about. Seek the engagement with your idea-focused circle, instead. Also, the more you can show this part of you, the more you can help others raise their bar, which only pays you back doubly!
What I don’t like about it
The order of ideas is backwards, in my mind. I think the quote should have started with the small people and worked up. I think that allows a person to understand the negative, first, so they have better context when they get to the way that great people talk. Not a huge deal, just more effective for people who only read this quote once.